Unhelpful Thinking Styles

Mind reading is when we assume we know what someone else is thinking.  We often imagine that their thoughts are about us, and that they are negative. This can lead us to jump to unhelpful conclusions.

Example: They are finding the conversation about my pain boring.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• Am I assuming I know what the other person is thinking?

• What evidence do I have that they are thinking this?

• Could these be my own thoughts, rather than theirs?

• What other factors might be affecting their behaviour or reaction?

• What would a kind or compassionate voice say to me in this situation?

Catastrophising is when we imagine the worst possible outcome and start to believe it will happen.

Example: The pain is only going to get worse.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• What are some alternative explanations for what is happening?

• What is the most likely outcome?

• What is the best-case scenario?

• If this thought is making me feel worse, what could be a more helpful perspective?

Shoulds and musts are thinking habits where we place very high or sometimes unrealistic expectations on ourselves or others. These expectations are based on strict rules about what we should or must do, or what we should not or must not do.

Example: I should be able to do this without any help.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• Am I putting a lot of pressure on myself?

• What rules am I telling myself about what I should or must do?

• Are these rules necessary or realistic for me today?

• How is this expectation affecting my emotions and behaviours?

• Can I change the “should” or “must” to a “could” or “would like to”?

Labelling is when we give ourselves or others a negative label based on the outcome of one small event.

Example: Missing one day of physiotherapy exercises and calling yourself a failure.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• What is the context surrounding the situation?

• Was anything that happened outside of my control or not my fault?

• Does this label apply in all situations, or just this one moment?

• Can I think of times when this label has not been true?

• What might be a more balanced or fair way to describe myself in this situation?

All-or-nothing thinking is when we see things in extremes, such as “good or bad” or “success or failure”, without noticing the “shades of grey” or middle ground in between.

Example: I must walk 5 kilometres every day, or it is not worth going on a walk at all.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• Am I seeing this situation in extremes, instead of noticing the shades of grey or middle ground?

• Is it better to do a little rather than nothing at all?

• Am I putting extra pressure on myself by focusing on the extremes?

• How could I view this situation in a more balanced way?

Emotional reasoning is when we treat our emotions as facts and make conclusions based on how we feel, without considering the actual evidence.

Example: I feel hopeless, so I will never be able to manage my pain.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• Can I recognise that my feelings are not facts?

• Are my emotions a reaction to my thoughts rather than the situation itself?

• If I was feeling a different emotion, how might my perspective change?

• Have I felt this way before? If so, how long did the feeling last?

Mental filtering is when we focus only on the negative parts of a situation and ignore other information, including anything positive or neutral.

Example: My pain is bad today, so nothing will make it better.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• Am I only noticing the negative parts of this situation?

• Am I filtering out any positive or neutral information?

• Is there any other information that I need to consider?

• How does this new information change my perspective?

Personalisation is when we assume that things we see, hear, or experience are about us or caused by us. This can lead to feeling overly responsible or blaming ourselves for things that are not fully in our control.

Example: You experience a flare-up and conclude it was caused by something you did, without considering other possible explanations.

Is this a thinking style you recognise? Can you think of a time when you have thought in this way?

You might find it helpful to write the answers to these questions:

• Was this something that I am fully responsible for, or were other factors involved?

• What other factors might have had an impact on the situation?

• Are my thoughts becoming self-critical or blaming toward myself?

• Would people who know me well see this situation the same way?

• What could be a more balanced or fair way to view what happened?

This sheet can help you practise noticing and understanding your thinking habits. By using it regularly and looking back at situations you have experienced, you can build your awareness of the patterns in your thoughts.

If you notice certain thinking styles appearing often and being unhelpful, you can start to catch these thoughts and emotions in the moment. This gives you the chance to use the questions and prompts in this booklet to explore different, more balanced perspectives in your everyday life.

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Sometimes it can be difficult to use the self‑help strategies in this booklet on your own. If this happens, you may find it helpful to speak with a trained therapist who can guide you through these techniques and offer extra support.

NHS Talking Therapies

You can self‑refer to a free local NHS service, or your GP can refer you.

These services are called NHS Talking Therapies for Anxiety and Depression.

To find your local service, visit:
https://www.nhs.uk/service-search/mental-health/find-a-psychological-therapies-service/

Speak to your GP

You can also speak to your GP to find out about any other local options for mental health support.